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the League of Reason Haiku and limerick thread

Prolescum

Active Member
Let your thoughts on life, the universe and everything be expressed in rhyme or moras :D

Waiting for God. Oh...

If I did as God always commanded
I'd find myself quickly remanded
by a quarter to three
I'd give them my plea
and do time that my peers had demanded



Go on, you know you want to do one...
 

nemesiss

Active Member
a couple of haiku's about the universe

the beautifull universe
always expanding
will you ever stop with growing?

it started with a big bang
it created all
it also created me

many many stars were born
most are dead by now
when i look up at the sky
 

Andiferous

Active Member
I was once tried for treason;
I tried to argue reason;
they put me in jail,
and said that I fail!
Now, I argue for pleasin'.

Alternate ending:

(You know, I am just teasin')

:D
 

MarrowHunger

New Member
I once asked if God did exist
I was told not to resist
The teachings of the 'lord'

But logic I did find
I learned to use my mind
and I cut his invisible cord
 

GrolschMan

New Member
I woke up with ache in my head.
I'd rather be back in to bed.
That bastard Morts trolled
And got me Rick Rolled
If no one objects, then he's dead.
 

GrolschMan

New Member
I waited a day for objections
To cleanse League of Reason's infection.
I took that as no,
so how does he go?
My vote is for lethal injection.
 

Josan

Member
Ben.Q. said:
I woke up with ache in my head.
I'd rather be back in to bed.
That bastard Morts trolled
And got me Rick Rolled
If no one objects, then he's dead.

Ben.Q. said:
I waited a day for objections
To cleanse League of Reason's infection.
I took that as no,
so how does he go?
My vote is for lethal injection.

Pure. Win.
 

alimck

Member
Truthful Christian once called the League of Reason,
Stating Evolution was scientific treason.
The boy just droned,
"If you look at pinecones!"
On his ass was declared 'Hunting Season'.
 

RichardMNixon

Active Member
Prolescum said:
[centre]I cannot fathom
why this thread receives no love
Bloody tragedy.[/centre]

Have you never heard
that atheists can't ever
see beauty and love?

Seriously though, I'm pretty sure I've heard "poetry" given as proof that god exists. Alternatively, if you're in more of a southern baptist mood.

The preacher once said to his flock
Don't you dare read this poetry schlock!
It's for women and gays
They'll burn in hell's blaze
Y'all just listen to Christian rock

----------------------------------------------------

I once met a Priest from Nantucket
Whose mass was so boring: "Just fuck it!"
I stood up from my pew
Yelled "You're all bored too!"
Then I punted the collection bucket.

The bucket flew up through the air
As the cash fell on every church stair
We bum-rushed the altar
The priest's faith took a falter
So then god murdered him with a bear

Now this bear on the church's floor
Let loose his godly, priest-eating roar
The flock bowed to pray
And I chose to stay
Since this new priest sure won't be a bore
 

Prolescum

Active Member
That's just weird, dude. :lol:

Also, it's nothing like the eye-popping Nantucket limerick I've heard (and certainly wouldn't repeat)...
 

Laurens

Active Member
There was a man called Rob Bunt
Who liked to go on the fox hunt
When it got banned, he held his head in his hands
And now he's a miserable cunt

Okay, so it's a bit shit, but it was off the top of my head...
 
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