Your thoughts on procreation....

[Nemesiah]

I don't want to have kids, I feel strongly about this.

My reasons for this are many:

Being an atheist I find that condemning that which I love the most to death is horrible, (Even with a certain death life is worth living yes, but is it worth creating?), and that is what bringing a kid into this world does.

I have a confortable life I do not wish to change that for a kid, and keeping my confortable life with a kid would be very selfish and irresponsible.

I think the world will be a very ugly place for the next century (war, famine, indoctrination, dehumanistic trends, etc...) I believe that most of the world will live lives riddled with hardships and would not want my kid to suffer them.

I'm not a particularly gifted individual (in any way) so I do not believe that my genes would benefit humankind thus I do not feel the urge to procerate.

I do not find the extintion of the human race to be particularly horrible as far as this occurs from a lack of reproduction. I place much more value on the individual lives of humans than on the idea of humanity as a whole.

I would like to hear your opinions on this topic, Do you feel that there are good reasons to have a kid nowadays?

Ed.

P.S. I'm tired so if some of what I wrote does not make much sense please bear with me.

 

[kenandkids]

I'm a father of 5 and 1/2 so I'm not one to comment... but now that I have...lol.

Procreation is fine, but I'm definitely supportive of those that choose not to. I'm not at all for agreeing that one must avoid creating a life because it will end, that just seems wrong on a personal psychological level. We are animals, and therefore subject to evolutionary impulses like breeding. I'd much rather my children be there to guide the world into sanity should they be able. Out of three teens, only one is religious and the other two are remarkably bright. My younger kids can out think and out fight most adults. With them as a template, the race just might survive.

 

[Aught3]

Yeah we have enough people on the planet already, we shouldn't even want everyone to procreate.

 

[Gnug215]

Hi, let's look at your reasons one by one:

I don't want to have kids, I feel strongly about this.

My reasons for this are many:

Being an atheist I find that condemning that which I love the most to death is horrible, (Even with a certain death life is worth living yes, but is it worth creating?), and that is what bringing a kid into this world does.

I find this to be a bad and odd reason, unless you, like... really hate life or something. The fact that you feel that "death" is a condemnation seems odd, perhaps especially as an atheist, where death is, well, the ultimate release, isn't it?

I don't really get it, really. Are you saying that life is so good that losing it to death is horrible? If so, life is worth creating, isn't it? Or is the prospect of death just so horrible in itself, that no life lived can compensate for it?

I have a confortable life I do not wish to change that for a kid, and keeping my confortable life with a kid would be very selfish and irresponsible.

This is a good reason, I'd say, although it may change when one gets older or finds a "suitable partner".

If you're not very old, then I'd say these are natural thoughts, which, however, will change in time.

If you don't have a suitable partner, then finding one might make the prospect of having offspring seem meaningful - if not for the powerful urge to procreate that your partner might have, which they might express regularly.

I think the world will be a very ugly place for the next century (war, famine, indoctrination, dehumanistic trends, etc...) I believe that most of the world will live lives riddled with hardships and would not want my kid to suffer them.

This is largely guesswork, I'd say. I have some reservations on this, too, but I think these kind of thoughts have probably always been prevalent, and in most cases, society has come through, advanced and overcome problems.

I'm certainly seeing many positive trends now, for instance in the area of energy research.
Water is often mentioned as a huge problem in the future, but I think we'll be able to increase the efficiency with which we turn saltwater into drinking water - it will mostly be a matter of cost and energy, so this talk about "water wars" may be a bit exaggerated.

In terms of famine and such, we're seeing trends of improvement there, too. The percentage of impoverished people is going down, as far as I remember, so that's good.

I'm not sure what to say about indoctrination. I think I'm seeing some trends of the opposite... except for a minor increase in home-schooled kids in the US.

I'm also not sure about these dehumanistic trends you mention. Could you elaborate on that?

I'm not a particularly gifted individual (in any way) so I do not believe that my genes would benefit humankind thus I do not feel the urge to procerate.

This sounds like a case of low self-worth or even DK. I don't know you very well, so I can't really say, but you seem intelligent enough. Above average, at the least. How about you go take a couple of IQ tests, and if your average of those is above the average of the public, then you reevaluate your position on this?

Your feelings about yourself are not likely a reflection of what is in your genes. You may have a lot of good stuff hidden in there.

Also... I guess I should mention the movie "Idiocracy" here.

I do not find the extintion of the human race to be particularly horrible as far as this occurs from a lack of reproduction. I place much more value on the individual lives of humans than on the idea of humanity as a whole.

I think this is a rather silly reason - especially if it's based on some kind of compulsion that you're percieving from society that demands that you procreate in the name of propagating the species or something.

I would like to hear your opinions on this topic, Do you feel that there are good reasons to have a kid nowadays?

Ed.

P.S. I'm tired so if some of what I wrote does not make much sense please bear with me.

Well, I have to say that the reasons you've given for not having kids have been bad ones.

As for good reasons, I think we need to ask the parents.

But one good reason I can think of which is sort of a response to one of your reasons, is that a kid can kick you well and good out of your comfort zone, which can arguably be a good thing. A kid will, hopefully, make you think of someone else other than number 1 (not accusing you of being selfish or self-centered here or anything). I think it might be a very healthy thing to have someone else be the main priority in ones life. Perhaps once one has lived comfortable for a long time, one will start longing for something else, something with more meaning, and perhaps having children is the answer to this?

 

[Gnug215]

Yeah we have enough people on the planet already, we shouldn't even want everyone to procreate.

Yeah, you're right.

We, the intelligent and well-educated skeptics (I'm describing the majority in this forum/community here, not myself) should totally stop procreting, and leave that to all the rabid religious rabbits and all the poor, uneducated people around the place.

 

[Memeticemetic]

I like kids too much to inflict my genes on any of the poor little bastards. And bastards is what they would inevitably be given my track record with relationships. Also, given my track record with relationships, the odds of said bastards already existing is alarmingly high...

...

I don't wanna think about this anymore. :|

 

[lrkun]

I don't mind having kids. In fact I want to have kids. The question though is whether one has the capacity and means to raise kids. And it's a personal choice, which means it is for you to decide in the end.

Why not have kids?

1. Responsibility as a parent is very necessary.
2. Money, lots of it is necessary.
3. Time.
4. Environment.

The same 1-4 applies to why have kids.

;9

 

[australopithecus]

I can't wait to have kids, only a couple at most though. I'm one of 3 and 3 certainly is a crowd.

 

[Welshidiot]

I think the world will be a very ugly place for the next century (war, famine, indoctrination, dehumanistic trends, etc...) I believe that most of the world will live lives riddled with hardships and would not want my kid to suffer them.

Nemesiah,...can you tell me which period of history was the idyllic one? That time when child-rearing was worry free? When there was nothing unpleasant looming on the metaphorical horizon?

As I said to my late wife nearly 20yrs ago when she expressed similar doubts and concerns: "There is no "right time" to have children. There will always be another goal to achieve, or crisis to avert, and if we keep waiting we'll probably wait forever."

Admittedly I've tidied up my prose there, but the sentiment remains unchanged.

At the moment you don't think it'll ever be for you,.....but at some point in the future there's a very good chance that you will encounter another human who will promote in you not just lust, but an unmistakable urge to breed.

It's a bit like the Christian saying: "You might not believe in God, but He believes in you."
Except in this case it's: "You might not want to procreate, but Nature gets the casting vote."

 

[Case]

As I said to my late wife nearly 20yrs ago when she expressed similar doubts and concerns: "There is no "right time" to have children. There will always be another goal to achieve, or crisis to avert, and if we keep waiting we'll probably wait forever."

Admittedly I've tidied up my prose there, but the sentiment remains unchanged.

[showmore=What really happened]Honey, I'm not..." - "OH come on, you want it, too" - "That's not what I..." - "GNNNNNN!" - "...on the pill" - " :shock: "[/showmore]

In fact, I should start procreating soon, the world needs more people like me.

 

[Welshidiot]

@Case: Quote tag fail.

 

[Inferno]

Can't wait to have kids.
A few friends of mine don't want to have kids. I can't understand why, but oh well, their problem not mine. I could probably have had a lil something with that one girl but I didn't want to because she didn't want kids.

 

[Divergedwoods]

Thoughts on procreation?...
magnificent process... Questionable outcome

 

[lrkun]

I want to have a kid. ;9.

 

[WarK]

I want to have a kid. ;9.

buy one on eBay

 

[kenandkids]

buy one on eBay

Isn't a rescue a better place? I keep hearing about the terrible conditions at breeding mills...

 

[Nemesiah]

I think the world will be a very ugly place for the next century (war, famine, indoctrination, dehumanistic trends, etc...) I believe that most of the world will live lives riddled with hardships and would not want my kid to suffer them.

Nemesiah,...can you tell me which period of history was the idyllic one? That time when child-rearing was worry free? When there was nothing unpleasant looming on the metaphorical horizon?

As I said to my late wife nearly 20yrs ago when she expressed similar doubts and concerns: "There is no "right time" to have children. There will always be another goal to achieve, or crisis to avert, and if we keep waiting we'll probably wait forever."

Admittedly I've tidied up my prose there, but the sentiment remains unchanged.

At the moment you don't think it'll ever be for you,.....but at some point in the future there's a very good chance that you will encounter another human who will promote in you not just lust, but an unmistakable urge to breed.

It's a bit like the Christian saying: "You might not believe in God, but He believes in you."
Except in this case it's: "You might not want to procreate, but Nature gets the casting vote."

I understan that IN THE ENTIRE HISTORY OF THE PLANET, there has not been a "right" moment to have kids (if you are poor, the rich nowadays have are having a great timel, sex, money power, technology, health, etc.) but my point is, IF my kid is going to come to die in an imperfect world why would I bring it here?

I mean if at some point one of my guys makes it accros the barrier then I'm gonna love that kid and I'm going to have to work hard as hell to give it the best opportunities in life, move to a better country so it might have a happier, healthier, safer life, BUT if there is no kid, I'm not harming it by not engendering it.

It might be a childish point of view to think that at some point the world will be better (I in fact think it's going to be all downhill from here) but the thing is if th world is going to be a kikass utopia in 150 years then my kid didn't see it, what would be the point of me bringign it here

"here you go son, the legacy of man, please don't mind the putrid stench of it, your kids are going to have a great time"

I am fully aware that biologically I'm an aberration that will correct it self by not procreating, but then aggain, this gives me such freedom, I don't have an agenda, I'm living for me and if the rest of humanity want's to polute its chillendren,´s watter, spoil it's children resources, I,´m going to advise it not to, but I don't really care, as far as Im concerned the world has to last another 66 years, after that I wish your progeny the best of luck, they are going to need it.

Thinking this way, would be aberrant if I had a kid. I don't want my kid to be brainwashed by tv, to be discriminated against, to be killed for his natural resouces, to have to go to school to learn lies, to have to deal with the anguish of embracing ones mortality so, if i don't have it he never did.

Oh, but you are depriving him from happiness, love, enlightment... yes, but she doesn't exist, he is never going to go into drugs, she is never gointo to earn the piano, he is not going to climb everest, she is not going to have an abusive boss.

And best of all I'm never going to have to worry about her since he doesn't exist, that makes me free.

Also , nature (in my case) gets to say when I die, not if and when I procreate, my father is like that, he just had a kid at 57, I'm not, I know the propper way of using a condom.

 

[Daealis]

I'll be having kids at some point. It's a good thing that me and my fiance are not in any way in a rush, both of us agree that "live a little and settle down later" is a good plan for the next few years. I'm smart enough to recognize that there really isn't a right time, it's always going to be some goal or difficulty upcoming. But I also know that almost every single parent, unless born with a gold spoon up their asses, has had the same buffet of troubles infront of them, and still prevailed, so I'm not too intimidated by the thought.

My friend was almost done with his studies(less than a year to go), when he told that her girlfriend was pregnant. He wasn't too sure about the whole situation and asked for my opinion, knowing that I can say what I honestly think to everyone, even with the risk of hurting them. To paraphrase my thoughts to him:

It's never a good time. Considering your situation, it's about the best it can be. By the time of birth, you'll be graduated and have landed a job. It's a bonus when you're looking for a job that you'll be able to say that there is a baby on the way, the employee knows that you need the money and are settling down. So you two go for it.

And so they did. And now their second kid is a few months away, house is half-paid and all that jazz.

On the other side of the spectrum is the little sister of my fiance. She has lived with her boyfriend from the age of 18, and they have no intentions of ever getting a kid. The reasons are pretty much the same already mentioned here: The comforts of their life don't need a third mouth to feed and care for.


So I guess that was three different stories for one.

 

[CosmicJoghurt]

buy one on eBay

Isn't a rescue a better place? I keep hearing about the terrible conditions at breeding mills...

I hope these kids are pedigreed.