Humor: I'm an atheist...

[DeistPaladin]

Scene opens with me at a pulpit reading from scripture.

"Abraham begat Isaac; and Isaac begat Jacob; and Jacob begat Judas and his brethren;
(pause)

And Judas begat Phares and Zara of Thamar; and Phares begat Esrom; and Esrom begat Aram;
(pause)

Oh it's no good. I never wanted to do this in the first place.
I always wanted...
...to be...
...an atheist!"

I'm an atheist and I'm OK.
I will not tithe and I do not pray.

Chorus: He's an atheist and he's OK.
He will not tithe and he does not pray.

I read Dawkins and Sagan too,
And Sam Harris as well.
I tell all of the fundies,
To go straight to their Hell.

Chorus: He readsDawkins and Sagan too,
And Sam Harris as well.
He tells all of the fundies,
To go straight to their Hell.

I'm an atheist and I'm OK.
I will not tithe and I do not pray..

I fight to keep a secular state.
I like the freethought crowd.
I value all the freedom,
Our Creator has endowed.

Chorus: He fights to keep the secular state
He likes the freethought crowd.
He values all the freedom,
(spoken) our Creator has endowed????

I'm an atheist and I'm OK.
I will not tithe and I do not pray.

I like my God. He leaves me alone.
He does not cramp my style.
And though I say I'm an atheist,
I've been a deist all the while.

Chorus: He likes his"¦ God???? ("What the...(crosstalk) ...not an atheist... (crosstalk) get outta here ya lousy...)

I'm a freethinker and I'm OK,
I will not tithe and I do not pray.
Yes, I'm a freethinker and I'm OK (pause)
I will not tithe and I do noooooot praaaaaaay.

EDIT TO ADD CREDIT: Based on Monte Python's "I'm a Lumberjack" song, for the 0.001% of the viewers who didn't already know that.

 

[Duvelthehobbit666]

That was pretty funny. Good job

 

[Prolescum]

Sorry mate, but this isn't funny or clever to me at all. Fortunately, my view doesn't count.