Otokogoroshi
New Member
Why do most of them suck? Who green-lights this shit? I just watched 'The Uninvited</URL><i></i>'. If you haven't seen it... skip it and see the one it's a 'remake' of '<URL url="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Tale_of_Two_Sisters">A Tale of Two Sisters'. The original Korean flick (like most original Asian horror movies) is just so much better. The pacing and retelling of the American version is so clumsy, stilted and all around dull.
It wasn't scary. Through most of the movie I kept having to resist the urge to pick up my DS and go back to learning Japanese (I got this new 'game' that teaches you
). I tend to actually have a really good attention span and give a lot of breaks to horror movies, certainly more than I do for other genres.
The thing is I love horror movies but... so many of them suck! And suck hard! They either miss the point so badly you think the writers, directors and every person down to the caterer know nothing about scaring anyone. Either they rely on the 'BOO! Something just jumped out and startled you! Not really scare you but maybe it looks kinda freaky but really you're still more surprised than scared..." or "GORE! Hey look!!! GORE!!! Intestines! Ewwwwww! Look! That guy is so skull fucking that chick!" both of which are unoriginal, dull and don't count as HORROR! Grossing me out and or surprising me isn't SCARY. It doesn't give me nightmares it just annoys or makes my stomach churn.
Seemingly at the moment the only way to see a good horror movie is to import something from Japan and ignore the American version which always misses the point more than Michael Bay missed the point in Pearl Harbor (to borrow from Team America World Police).
Actually I'll take that back. I thought The Ring was way scarier than Ringu which was still a good movie but in a different more cranial way than The Ring which just made me scared of my TV. I still keep it covered with a towel when I'm not watching it >_> At least the TV in my room that is. Then again Poltergeist helped with this little issue
See to me a good horror movie is one that makes you afraid to turn out the lights, afraid to look under your bed and reminds you what its like to be a kid with an over active imagination! So I'm going to list a few of my favorite horror movies and my opinions on them. I'd like if others shared their thoughts as well.
Silent Hill:- Say what you will about it just taking the general idea of a few Silent Hill games, completely missing the point on several different occasions and bringing in Pyramid Head just for fan wank but... I still enjoyed it! The music (all but directly pulled from at least two of the games) was just.... *shivers* ok this music makes me tingle with happy and well... I'm a Pyramid Head fangirl! Sure he scares me and makes me want to hide in a closet and cry but at the same time... I love the freak! The visuals and sound effects in this movie were great! I like how they tried, and did a decent job of capturing the feel of the games. Many of the things that happened sure come close to my above rant about gore but do it in a way that it horrifies you instead of just makes you roll your eyes. The gore is rare enough and shocking enough that it didn't seem just to be put there to fill some kind of "Need X many buckets of blood" quota. Could have been waaaaaaaaay better but hey... it didn't make me want to claw my eyes out.
Night of the Living Dead :- This movie is a classic. Its a classic for many reasons and like JRR's Lord of the Rings even if you don't really like it or enjoy it you at least have to respect and thank it for making the genre what it is. Before this movie came out horror movies well... weren't really all that scary. Really Bela Lugosi as Dracula was scary when today its so tame you could play it on the Disney channel... well not THAT tame... but close!!! Even seen through today's jaded "Been there seen that" movie viewer eyes it still provides a few scares and holds ones attention. An amazing feat in today's instant gratification world.
Friday the 13th (the original):- I'll admit. I'm cheating a bit on this one. I haven't seen the whole thing and haven't seen the bits I have seen since... I was like eight. Hey it only came out two years before I was born!!! However the plot, just in the first one, was way better than the following movies which ditch the original more interesting premise for something that requires no difficult thoughts... which is standard for today's horror movies. So this one also gets points taken away for bringing about serial horror movies of suck.
Psycho :- Yeah sure I said earlier that the later made Night of the Living dead help start the horror genre but Psycho is an even earlier film that needs much thanks. I still think the two are so very different they both helped build two different types of horror movies. One that takes normal situations and makes them scary and the other that well.... ZOMFG ZOMBIES ARE EATING PEOPLE! DID THAT GIRL JUST KILL SOMEONE WITH A GARDEN TROWEL!!? Apples and oranges but both are tasty. Thank you Alfred Hitchcock. Solid movie all around. Made me afraid of my doll house which looked exactly like the house in the movie!
Shaun of the Dead :- A rom/com/zom movie. What could possibly go wrong? NOTHING! A brilliantly funny movie that actually has real moments of terror and shock in it! Very British but not so obtuse as to fly completely over the ignorant yanks head's (I'm American I can say this... isn't that how it works?). If you haven't seen it. Do yourself a favor and see it. Blends the various genres with amazing finesse.
A Tale of Two Sisters :- I mentioned it in passing earlier but this movie is great. A bit slow paced so if you have the attention span of a gold fish and are unable to follow a plot that doesn't lead you around by the nose... well if that the case *jingles keys* Look at the shiny!! Otherwise a good solid horror movie that understands you don't always have to understand what's going on to enjoy yourself. Explains a little too much at the end but at least it doesn't rely on being ambiguous just 'cause it can.
The Ring :- This movie is partly to blame for the slew of "Oh look a creepy little girl!" horror movie trend. Sure other movies did it and way older movies can also claim the blame but this one really brought it out and used it shamelessly. Jesus Christ eating Cheerios this movie scared me T_T Only loosely resembles its Japanese cousin RIngu but for once that's ok! Full of lots of great visuals and shows that the director knows what he's doing. The kid is annoying thought but I hate children in movies anyway (The boy not Samara)
The People Under the Stairs :- It's been a few years since I've seen this movie but I still remember really enjoying it a lot. Enough that I actually remember it and well... My memory is questionable at best at times This movie reminds you that yes Wes Craven can actually make horror movies and yes he knows what he's doing... some of the time. He's sorta like George Lucas in a way. Can help make a good movie but if given too much leeway goes off message.
IT :- This movie makes everyone afraid of clowns. If you see this movie and Pennywise doesn't scare you... you must have ice flowing in your veins. However really scary clown aside... this is a dumb movie. Steven King isn't a good writer. Sure he has a few good things but if you through enough shit at the wall eventually something will stick. He has a sea of crap with a few nuggets in there that maybe... just look better with the sewer water backdrop. See it but don't think too much.
Pet Sematary :- Again a fairly dumb movie... but it still has some scares in it. Also has the 'creepy kid' theme in it but its brief and done well enough. Has the typical dumb horror movie end but still worth watching. I'm not sure of American Werewolf in London rips this off or Steven King rips off that movie... oh well no such thing as an original idea right?!
Event Horizon :- A sci-fi horror movie with a slew of good actors a pretty good plot and GREAT scares in it. See it uncut, not much was missing from the final but the little bit that was cut really adds to it. Has its flaws but at least a black guy actually lives to the end! In horror movies that's really damned rare!!!
Poltergeist :- Come on... what needs to be said? There is a tree in it... and it scares you. It has a clown in it... and its fucking scary and evil. Solid movie from start to finish. If you haven't seen it... Put the rock aside and come live in the real world with the rest of us
28 Days Later :- Really. Very. Good. Movie. One of my favorite. Sexy Irish guy in the lead? Just a bonus. Seeing penis? Super bonus! I'm kidding... actually I'm not. You get to see his doodle for a few moments. British aren't as uptight as most others so whatever... I don't actually consider it a horror movie but an Armageddon/zombie movie. Which is a genre related to horror but they don't often share the same bed. Kinda silly premise but once you ignore it it breathes fresh life into the previously stale zombie genre (pun maybe intended)
The Mist :- Another one from Steven King, no shock he partly makes his living off of horror. This movie is great. A lot really hated the ending but it at least goes somewhere almost all movies are afraid to and it doesn't flinch away from it. Good fun monsters with the typical goofy King angle but still very good. The best parts actually have little to do with the monsters and more so show the monsters inside people as well as the heroes. See it!
Frailty :- This movie isn't too well known but really good. I found out my friend is attracted to crazy men after seeing this movie (her boyfriends now get the hairy eyeball to make sure they aren't the Texas Chainsaw type). You guys will like this since it deals with them crazy Christians!!! Highly suggest renting this sucker.
Well I think that should be enough. I left off a decent number of good horror movies. I'll finish this up with a quick list of some of the worst.
I could pretty much say: Anything sci-fi channel makes but that would be cheating and those are almost so bad they're good and they exist to give drunk college kids a great premise for shots based games.
Jeepers Creepers : - You know... I don't even think this movie knew what it wanted to be! It switches gears halfway through, makes little sense and I swear its like two different writers wrote the begging and the end. Also they never spoke. Also they didn't know someone else was writing the begging/the end. Also they spoke a different language from each other. Also someone not native to either languages translated it. Also I'm really not sure if the two main characters are lovers or siblings.... they don't do anything but there is a subtle ambiguity about it that freaks me out.
Blair Witch Project :- Dumb. Dumb. Dumb. Boring. Dull and dumb. Only the end has a slightly interesting part but the rest of it is just a bunch of 20 somethings roaming the woods cussing and yelling. Really really... dumb.
I Still Know What You Did Last Summer :- Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugggggggggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... Just... no. Pointless. So many cliches. It's like someone had a check list of horror movie cliches they were checking off while making this movie.
The Haunting (1999) :- Dated... very dated. Also not too scary. I actually kinda have a soft spot for this one but... it's still not very good at all.
To be honest I took a sleep pill awhile ago so this might not be fully lucid. I just felt like ranting about of of my favorite things. Thoughts please!!! <3
It wasn't scary. Through most of the movie I kept having to resist the urge to pick up my DS and go back to learning Japanese (I got this new 'game' that teaches you
). I tend to actually have a really good attention span and give a lot of breaks to horror movies, certainly more than I do for other genres.The thing is I love horror movies but... so many of them suck! And suck hard! They either miss the point so badly you think the writers, directors and every person down to the caterer know nothing about scaring anyone. Either they rely on the 'BOO! Something just jumped out and startled you! Not really scare you but maybe it looks kinda freaky but really you're still more surprised than scared..." or "GORE! Hey look!!! GORE!!! Intestines! Ewwwwww! Look! That guy is so skull fucking that chick!" both of which are unoriginal, dull and don't count as HORROR! Grossing me out and or surprising me isn't SCARY. It doesn't give me nightmares it just annoys or makes my stomach churn.
Seemingly at the moment the only way to see a good horror movie is to import something from Japan and ignore the American version which always misses the point more than Michael Bay missed the point in Pearl Harbor (to borrow from Team America World Police).
Actually I'll take that back. I thought The Ring was way scarier than Ringu which was still a good movie but in a different more cranial way than The Ring which just made me scared of my TV. I still keep it covered with a towel when I'm not watching it >_> At least the TV in my room that is. Then again Poltergeist helped with this little issue
See to me a good horror movie is one that makes you afraid to turn out the lights, afraid to look under your bed and reminds you what its like to be a kid with an over active imagination! So I'm going to list a few of my favorite horror movies and my opinions on them. I'd like if others shared their thoughts as well.
Silent Hill:- Say what you will about it just taking the general idea of a few Silent Hill games, completely missing the point on several different occasions and bringing in Pyramid Head just for fan wank but... I still enjoyed it! The music (all but directly pulled from at least two of the games) was just.... *shivers* ok this music makes me tingle with happy
and well... I'm a Pyramid Head fangirl! Sure he scares me and makes me want to hide in a closet and cry but at the same time... I love the freak! The visuals and sound effects in this movie were great! I like how they tried, and did a decent job of capturing the feel of the games. Many of the things that happened sure come close to my above rant about gore but do it in a way that it horrifies you instead of just makes you roll your eyes. The gore is rare enough and shocking enough that it didn't seem just to be put there to fill some kind of "Need X many buckets of blood" quota. Could have been waaaaaaaaay better but hey... it didn't make me want to claw my eyes out.Night of the Living Dead :- This movie is a classic. Its a classic for many reasons and like JRR's Lord of the Rings even if you don't really like it or enjoy it you at least have to respect and thank it for making the genre what it is. Before this movie came out horror movies well... weren't really all that scary. Really Bela Lugosi as Dracula was scary when today its so tame you could play it on the Disney channel... well not THAT tame... but close!!! Even seen through today's jaded "Been there seen that" movie viewer eyes it still provides a few scares and holds ones attention. An amazing feat in today's instant gratification world.
Friday the 13th (the original):- I'll admit. I'm cheating a bit on this one. I haven't seen the whole thing and haven't seen the bits I have seen since... I was like eight. Hey it only came out two years before I was born!!! However the plot, just in the first one, was way better than the following movies which ditch the original more interesting premise for something that requires no difficult thoughts... which is standard for today's horror movies. So this one also gets points taken away for bringing about serial horror movies of suck.
Psycho :- Yeah sure I said earlier that the later made Night of the Living dead help start the horror genre but Psycho is an even earlier film that needs much thanks. I still think the two are so very different they both helped build two different types of horror movies. One that takes normal situations and makes them scary and the other that well.... ZOMFG ZOMBIES ARE EATING PEOPLE! DID THAT GIRL JUST KILL SOMEONE WITH A GARDEN TROWEL!!? Apples and oranges but both are tasty. Thank you Alfred Hitchcock. Solid movie all around. Made me afraid of my doll house which looked exactly like the house in the movie!
Shaun of the Dead :- A rom/com/zom movie. What could possibly go wrong? NOTHING! A brilliantly funny movie that actually has real moments of terror and shock in it! Very British but not so obtuse as to fly completely over the ignorant yanks head's (I'm American I can say this... isn't that how it works?). If you haven't seen it. Do yourself a favor and see it. Blends the various genres with amazing finesse.
A Tale of Two Sisters :- I mentioned it in passing earlier but this movie is great. A bit slow paced so if you have the attention span of a gold fish and are unable to follow a plot that doesn't lead you around by the nose... well if that the case *jingles keys* Look at the shiny!! Otherwise a good solid horror movie that understands you don't always have to understand what's going on to enjoy yourself. Explains a little too much at the end but at least it doesn't rely on being ambiguous just 'cause it can.
The Ring :- This movie is partly to blame for the slew of "Oh look a creepy little girl!" horror movie trend. Sure other movies did it and way older movies can also claim the blame but this one really brought it out and used it shamelessly. Jesus Christ eating Cheerios this movie scared me T_T Only loosely resembles its Japanese cousin RIngu but for once that's ok! Full of lots of great visuals and shows that the director knows what he's doing. The kid is annoying thought but I hate children in movies anyway (The boy not Samara)
The People Under the Stairs :- It's been a few years since I've seen this movie but I still remember really enjoying it a lot. Enough that I actually remember it and well... My memory is questionable at best at times
This movie reminds you that yes Wes Craven can actually make horror movies and yes he knows what he's doing... some of the time. He's sorta like George Lucas in a way. Can help make a good movie but if given too much leeway goes off message.IT :- This movie makes everyone afraid of clowns. If you see this movie and Pennywise doesn't scare you... you must have ice flowing in your veins. However really scary clown aside... this is a dumb movie. Steven King isn't a good writer. Sure he has a few good things but if you through enough shit at the wall eventually something will stick. He has a sea of crap with a few nuggets in there that maybe... just look better with the sewer water backdrop. See it but don't think too much.
Pet Sematary :- Again a fairly dumb movie... but it still has some scares in it. Also has the 'creepy kid' theme in it but its brief and done well enough. Has the typical dumb horror movie end but still worth watching. I'm not sure of American Werewolf in London rips this off or Steven King rips off that movie... oh well no such thing as an original idea right?!
Event Horizon :- A sci-fi horror movie with a slew of good actors a pretty good plot and GREAT scares in it. See it uncut, not much was missing from the final but the little bit that was cut really adds to it. Has its flaws but at least a black guy actually lives to the end! In horror movies that's really damned rare!!!
Poltergeist :- Come on... what needs to be said? There is a tree in it... and it scares you. It has a clown in it... and its fucking scary and evil. Solid movie from start to finish. If you haven't seen it... Put the rock aside and come live in the real world with the rest of us
28 Days Later :- Really. Very. Good. Movie. One of my favorite. Sexy Irish guy in the lead? Just a bonus. Seeing penis? Super bonus! I'm kidding... actually I'm not. You get to see his doodle for a few moments. British aren't as uptight as most others so whatever... I don't actually consider it a horror movie but an Armageddon/zombie movie. Which is a genre related to horror but they don't often share the same bed. Kinda silly premise but once you ignore it it breathes fresh life into the previously stale zombie genre (pun maybe intended)
The Mist :- Another one from Steven King, no shock he partly makes his living off of horror. This movie is great. A lot really hated the ending but it at least goes somewhere almost all movies are afraid to and it doesn't flinch away from it. Good fun monsters with the typical goofy King angle but still very good. The best parts actually have little to do with the monsters and more so show the monsters inside people as well as the heroes. See it!
Frailty :- This movie isn't too well known but really good. I found out my friend is attracted to crazy men after seeing this movie (her boyfriends now get the hairy eyeball to make sure they aren't the Texas Chainsaw type). You guys will like this since it deals with them crazy Christians!!! Highly suggest renting this sucker.
Well I think that should be enough. I left off a decent number of good horror movies. I'll finish this up with a quick list of some of the worst.
I could pretty much say: Anything sci-fi channel makes but that would be cheating and those are almost so bad they're good and they exist to give drunk college kids a great premise for shots based games.
Jeepers Creepers : - You know... I don't even think this movie knew what it wanted to be! It switches gears halfway through, makes little sense and I swear its like two different writers wrote the begging and the end. Also they never spoke. Also they didn't know someone else was writing the begging/the end. Also they spoke a different language from each other. Also someone not native to either languages translated it. Also I'm really not sure if the two main characters are lovers or siblings.... they don't do anything but there is a subtle ambiguity about it that freaks me out.
Blair Witch Project :- Dumb. Dumb. Dumb. Boring. Dull and dumb. Only the end has a slightly interesting part but the rest of it is just a bunch of 20 somethings roaming the woods cussing and yelling. Really really... dumb.
I Still Know What You Did Last Summer :- Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugggggggggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... Just... no. Pointless. So many cliches. It's like someone had a check list of horror movie cliches they were checking off while making this movie.
The Haunting (1999) :- Dated... very dated. Also not too scary. I actually kinda have a soft spot for this one but... it's still not very good at all.
To be honest I took a sleep pill awhile ago so this might not be fully lucid. I just felt like ranting about of of my favorite things. Thoughts please!!! <3
