Are you going to hell?

[blinddesign]

I didn't know whether to put this in religion/irreligion because it's not really serious but anyway:
I saw this picture in the amusing pics section and realised I have NO chance-

So I want everyone to write, from that list, whats fits them. mine:
-Liar (who isn't?)
-thief (slight things, but it's still a sin I 'spose.) :ugeek:
-sports fan (WTF?)
-blasphemer. since I was a child and loving it.
-pagan. in the way of being an atheist and loving nature and shit, no witchcraft boll0x.
-witch. MWUHAHAHAHAAAA!!!! a belief in witches? I can understand their need to believe in loving sky-daddy but are witches even mentioned in the bible?
-atheist (duh)
-gambler. i've placed a few bets in my life, never been in a casino tho.
-porn-lover. FUCK YEAH! i fucking fap all the time, so kill me :roll:
-evolutionist. (cuz syense iz for deyvil-wurshipperzz!!!)
-pot smoker. i have done it. i don't do it often (for no particular reason, i just don't) but i plan to continue on the odd occasion.
-fornicator (well, i'm a virgin on account of being only 15 but i plan to fornicate, and i have already "commited adultery in my heart" according to jeebus.
-masturbator. lol. see aforementioned statement on pornography.

now, hypocrite... i try not to be and i certainly can't think of any particular occasion when i have comited <intentional> hypocrisy, so i'll give my self a half-mark. also, i didn't count witch, that was a joke. i will also add "satanist" to the list (it's odd that they missed it out :|) see youtube account "anglaismoyen" for info .

so I score:
13.5/22

let's see how you score!

 

[GoodKat]

This seems to be along the same lines as Ray Comfort's "If you lie once you're a liar ect" crap.

EDIT: Sports Fans?!

 

[DeistPaladin]

Drunkard: Maybe. Went through my "party animal" phase in college. I've grown up since. Barely drink now. Does that count as "repenting"?

Blasphemer: Oh yes. A day without blasphemy against Jesus and Muhammad is like a day without sunshine for me.

Money-lover: Maybe. Define?

Homosexual: I'm bisexual and had a male lover once, so I guess that counts.

Atheist: I'm an atheist with regard to their god, as they are for anyone else's so that covers everyone.

Porn-lovers: I met my now-wife because I wrote her and told her how I liked her gay porn, so yes.

Evolutionist: Yes. Is being a "gravityist" also a sin?

Pot-smoker: I tried it once. Does that count?

Fornicators: No longer now that I've settled down but I had my past that I don't repent for.

Masturbators: [Monte Python Accents/] No... no... no... um... yes... a bit... a bit...

Somewhere between 6 and 10.

EDIT:

EDIT: Sports Fans?!

I'm guessing that's "any distraction from religious devotion" or perhaps "sports hero worship = idolatry"?

 

[PuppetXeno]

Lol...

Drunkards.. well I do sometimes get loaded, a few times per year,
Liars... Definately not regularly, and surely not maliciously, but I do bend the truth on occasion!
Thieves... thepiratebay.org
Sports Fans... lol nO! No, I'm not. I do workout though, but I'm not a hooligan or anything.
Blasphemers... Hell yeah
Money-Lovers... Well I need money but I don't love it, so no
Pagans... no, humored it a bit for a while for laughs, does having a ouija bord and tarot decks count?
Homosexuals... not my thing really, no,
Prostitutes... nah,
Witches... does having a ouija bord and tarot decks count?
Atheists... guilty
Gamblers... not really, I've played a bit of poker sure and oh yeah, the national lottery.. guilty
Porn-lovers... I like it only if I get to participate, else no ty
Whoremongers... Been there, done that...
Child-molesters... never
Evolutionists... stupid term, but guilty I suppose
Pot smokers... been there, done that
Lesbians... physiologically impossible
Fornicators... well, yeah,
Masturbators... No. (see point 2)
Hypocrites... hmmm no
Psychics... would be cool, but no

11 points I guess. :ugeek:

 

[ImprobableJoe]

So, wait... masturbation makes the list, but MURDER doesn't? Seems to me that they've got some serious issues with their priorities.

 

[DeistPaladin]

they've got some serious issues with their priorities.

You just summed up the problems with Islamo-Christian concepts of "morality". Harmless activities are labeled "evil" while useless or even destructive activities are labeled as virtuous.

 

[buzzausa]

EDIT: Sports Fans?!

I know.....that's hilarious :lol: :lol:

And about the rest of the list.....I'm doomed.




I'll see you all there :lol:

 

[MachineSp1rit]

drunkard-maybe

liar-NO, one of my good characters, almost never lie (almost of course)

thief-also no

Sport fan-no but why the fuck do sports matter

Blasphemer- defiantly YES, YES i can prove it, fuck you god.

money lover-yeah, but i'm not greedy

pagan-yes

homosexual-no lol

prostitutes-twice

witch lol

atheist-that's a tough one

gambler-no

porn-lover- oooh yess

child-molester-don't recall

evolutionists-LOOOL what a bunch of fucking retards

pot-smokers-that prolly means weed? then yes.

Fornicator- don't know what that is.

masturbator-yes, i wonder who would love porn and not masturbate.

hypocrite-no

psychnics-not sure what they mean by that


10/22

 

[blinddesign]

Porn-lovers: I met my now-wife because I wrote her and told her how I liked her gay porn, so yes.

that sentence seemed odd to me for some reason... do you mean she made it or starred in it?

So, wait... masturbation makes the list, but MURDER doesn't? Seems to me that they've got some serious issues with their priorities.

yup. they missed out murder, rape, all of the harmful drugs (yet victimised the one that has never killed anyone).

Blasphemer- defiantly YES, YES i can prove it, fuck you god.
...
Fornicator- don't know what that is.
...
masturbator-yes, i wonder who would love porn and not masturbate.

i forgot to prove my blasphemy... god had sex with his illegitimate son, who also fucked his father (the human one) in his carpentry workshop but didn't forget his metaphysical father, with whom he spent a whole seven days fucking, after which god spunked everywhere and created the sea and jesus farted in excitement and blew his chunks into the sea, creating turtles.

fornicator means someone who has sex before marriage, which includes every single animal besides humans but also includes every single human that lives in a society that doesn't have a marriage ritual (and those who just don't give a fuck).

someone who loves porn but doesn't masturbate? someone who loves the artistic directing of the film, maybe? a psychologist researching sexual attraction?

good answers, people. remember to put your score.

 

[DeistPaladin]

that sentence seemed odd to me for some reason... do you mean she made it or starred in it?

She writes literary fiction and draws artwork which she posts on her website. A lot of her stuff is male/male, though not all of it.

 

[JerseyDagmar]

'Better to rule in Hell, then to serve in Heaven'

That's what I'll say to Yahweh if I am wrong about his existence.

 

[darthrender2010]

psychnics-not sure what they mean by that

lolz, the sign says psychics.

 

[Gnug215]

What would an "opposite" sign say?

That is, one for our side against them.
And where would they go, if not hell? Intellectual oblivion, maybe?

So let's make a list:

Creationists
Illogical people
Unreasonable people

Ok, so all those three are about the same...

Oh, and sports fans.

What else?


Btw, I think I score about 8 or 9 on that one hell list. I was being a bit liberal, so it's probably a bit less in reality.
Oh, and "liberal" seems to be missing from that list.

 

[MachineSp1rit]

lolz, the sign says psychics.

meh, typo

 

[buzzausa]

And where would they go, if not hell? Intellectual oblivion, maybe?

So....nothing would change for them?

 

[Gnug215]

So....nothing would change for them?

Lol, you're absolutely right.

Ok, hmm... maybe they'd end up... in a boring biology lecture that lasts forever, where they can't say anything? Maybe because their mouths have "evolved" shut?

 

[Aught3]

I have a suggestion for the christians, if they think they have an infinite, blissful second life to look forward to, and atheists think that they only have one, short life to enjoy now; shouldn't they let us have this one?

Also the sign is screwy, the only people that go to hell are those that don't ask for forgiveness, and those that deny the holy spirit.

 

[JerseyDagmar]

If these bible thumping idiots are the only ones going to heaven, then bring on hell.

All the cool people will be there. :lol:

 

[Daealis]

Drunk: Check. Whenever I feel like it, which seems to be roughly once or twice per month. Or atleast quarterly per year.
Liars: Check. I have no conscious bumps if I see a lie as the best way of getting through a situation. Little white lies to make the world brighter, someone feel better.
Thieves: Check. I'm not proud, but as a kid I've stolen a handful of candy, and I've collected a hefty collection of pints from different bars. For glasses I've reasoned it thusly: A bar expects a certain amount of glasses to break in an evening as a result of drunken stupor, so they are not missed.
Sports Fans: I wouldn't say so. I enjoy watching parkour, but that's about as far as I go.
Blasphemers: Check. Why should that be so goddam problematic?
Money-Lovers: Check. Studying for a bigger paycheck.
Pagans: Check. At some point I've had very faint belief in a form of wiccan nature-based magick.
Homosexuals: Kinda-Check. I wouldn't be surprised to find myself at least bisexual(and I do think they ment every 'non-straight' in this & category lesbian)
Prostitutes: Nah, I'm so good I get paid back!
Witches: Check. Although I read a lot of theory on magick at my 'pagan'-era, never actually did anything more than try a method of astral projection. Didn't work, but I guess that could be considered magick.
Atheists: Check. Been so for a few years now.
Gamblers: Check. Every now and then I like to do some lottery and slot-machines. Maybe I'll get lucky.
Porn-lovers: Check. I'm a man, I like to watch porn and with that comes..
Masturbators: Check. Yeah. So shoot me.
Whoremongers: Not.
Child-molesters: Not.
Evolutionists: Check.
Pot smokers: Not.....yet.
Lesbians: By definition impossible. I do like girls, though.
Fornicators: Check. As often as possible(long-distance relationship for the past 4 years with my fiancee, so...)
Hypocrites: Check. Of course I fake and pretend in some occasions.
Psychics: Haven't tried any divinations, since I haven't really believed in them at any point. For some weird reason I've always thought that asatru-type divination with runes would be most convincing to me, I can't explain why that feels "more reliable" than tarot, tealeaves or others.

So there you have it, not-so-surprising answers to pretty basic list of thou-shall-not's. 14,½ out of 22

 

[acerba]

I scored 9.

But... you can't go someplace that doesn't exist :roll: