Ahmadinejad: "Europe is stealing Iran's rain"

[Pulsar]

Full-time lunatic Mahmoud Ahmadinejad gave a jaw-dropping speech in which he accused Western countries of plotting to "cause drought" in Iran by using high tech equipment to drain the clouds of raindrops.

source

"Western countries have designed plans to cause drought in certain areas of the world, including Iran," Mr Ahmadinejad said in the city of Arak in Markazi province.

"According to reports on climate, whose accuracy has been verified, European countries are using special equipment to force clouds to dump" their water on their continent, he said.

By doing so, "they prevent rain clouds from reaching regional countries, including Iran," Mr Ahmadinejad charged.

Hey Mahmoud, we're not 'stealing your rain', we too are having one of the worst droughts ever. Let's blame the Americans!

 

[Master_Ghost_Knight]

When basic needs go to hell everyone will blame everyone and they can't recognise that shit just happens.

 

[Isotelus]

Damn, he's figured out our master plan. Should we tell him we engineered the Japan earthquake too?

 

[Unwardil]

Wait, wait, wait, WAIT!

Isn't... Iran mostly desert to begin with? Sure it's crazy to claim the nations of Europe are stealing rain... But from a desert? Surely if they were stealing rain, they'd do it from some place like, oh, I dunno, Brazil or Scotland. I mean, that's like every comic book supervillain who spends untold billions developing their ultimate death machine technology only to use it to rob hundreds of thousands of dollars from banks.

 

[Case]

Damn, he's figured out our master plan. Should we tell him we engineered the Japan earthquake too?

Liar! The earthquake was an inside job.

 

[BrainBlow]

FUCK YOU, AMHEDINEJAD! YOU CAN HAVE YOUR BLOODY RAIN! GIMME BACK MY SUNNY WEATHER!!

 

[australopithecus]

Damn, he's figured out our master plan. Should we tell him we engineered the Japan earthquake too?

 

[ArthurWilborn]

Serious question: Is this even technically possible? I've read reports of creating rain via discharge of smoke or seeding particles into clouds, but I wasn't able to determine the veracity of what I've read.

 

[RigelKentaurusA]

Serious question: Is this even technically possible? I've read reports of creating rain via discharge of smoke or seeding particles into clouds, but I wasn't able to determine the veracity of what I've read.

I'm sure it's possible. I've read fof the same reports you have but from what I understand, the results weren't as conclusive as advertised.

 

[Balstrome]

I know you all know this, but HE is a president of a country. That means I believe some few dozen people actually voted for him. Okay, I know George Bush, but those were Americans....

 

[Welshidiot]

I have it on good authority that this year the amount of rainfall in the UK has been only 10% of the seasonal average for the three month period between February and May.

 

[RigelKentaurusA]

I have it on good authority that this year the amount of rainfall in the UK has been only 10% of the seasonal average for the three month period between February and May.

Clearly someone's intercepting your rain...

 

[Dean]

When basic needs go to hell everyone will blame everyone and they can't recognise that shit just happens.

Indeed. Human beings are "pattern seeking primates", as I would like to say, even when there is no pattern or anything of the sort to be observed. I also think that there is some degree of connection between religious extremism; such as Islamic extremists, and things like this. In fact, it's not completely out of the question that increased droughts could be a result of climate change. So maybe he's even right in some small sense, but not in the manner suggested in this description, with cool technology and such like. He might also have some unconscious or implicit bias against Europeans. Wouldn't surprise me, I guess.

 

[Dean]

Damn, he's figured out our master plan. Should we tell him we engineered the Japan earthquake too?

Liar! The earthquake was an inside job.

So was the one in Haiti, apparently... (joke)...!